MARRIAGE, DIVORCE AND REMARRIAGE.

The topic of Marriage, Divorce and Remarriage is controversial in the Western Culture.  We are in the midst of a cultural revolution in this culture, and the what the culture wants has become the norm, even to the point of replacing the teachings of Christ.  This portion of the web page is meant to reexamine the teachings of the Bible regarding Marriage, Divorce and Remarriage so that the reader might be able to consider the evidence and make an informed decision for himself or herself.  When Christ and His apostles taught regarding these subjects, it was counter cultural.  His teachings are still counter cultural.

The OT Basis for NT Teachings:

 

Gen 2:19 - 25 (ESV) 19So out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name.  20The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him.  21So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh.  22And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man.  23Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. 24Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh 25And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.

The passage forms the basis for the teachings of Jesus and Paul.  With the exception of Moses’ allowing of divorce in Deut 24:1-4, it also forms the understanding of the prophets.

 

Ex 20:14 (ESV) 14“You shall not commit adultery.

This is the Mosaic Law basis for defining adultery as a sin.  It is one of the 10 commandments.  Therefore, it was a matter of great weight in the mind of God.

 

Deut 24:1 - 4 (ESV) 1“When a man takes a wife and marries her, if then she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, and she departs out of his house,  2and if she goes and becomes another man’s wife 3and the latter man hates her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, or if the latter man dies, who took her to be his wife,  4then her former husband, who sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after she has been defiled, for that is an abomination before the Lord. And you shall not bring sin upon the land that the Lord your God is giving you for an inheritance.

This is the allowance God made for the Jews because their hearts were hard, and they would not accept the standard God set at creation.  The import of the passage is that the man could divorce his wife because “…he has found some indecency in her….”  He was obligated to give her a certificate of divorce, showing that she was no longer subject to him.  She could then remarry, but if that second husband sends her away, then she couldn't go back to her first husband.  However, Moses clearly refers to the second marriage as a state in which the wife was “defiled,” reinforcing the fact that God was not happy with the second marriage, and that what He wants is monogamous marriage for life.

Ezra 10:1 - 5 (ESV) 1While Ezra prayed and made confession, weeping and casting himself down before the house of God, a very great assembly of men, women, and children, gathered to him out of Israel, for the people wept bitterly.  2And Shecaniah the son of Jehiel, of the sons of Elam, addressed Ezra: “We have broken faith with our God and have married foreign women from the peoples of the land, but even now there is hope for Israel in spite of this.  3Therefore let us make a covenant with our God to put away all these wives and their children, according to the counsel of my lord and of those who tremble at the commandment of our God, and let it be done according to the Law 4Arise, for it is your task, and we are with you; be strong and do it.”  5Then Ezra arose and made the leading priests and Levites and all Israel take oath that they would do as had been said. So they took the oath.

In Ezra chapters 9-10, Ezra returns to Jerusalem to join the other exiles that had already come out of Babylon and had already returned to Jerusalem to rebuild it.  However, Ezra discovers that many of these exiles had married foreign women.  This was against the Law (Exodus 34:11-16).  Ezra confesses this great sin before God, and confesses that they are in guilt having forsaken His commandments.  Most of those who witnessed Ezra’s prayer were stricken with guilt, and they also confessed their sin.  They made a covenant with God to put away these wives and their children.  Those in modern times often look back with dismay at what Ezra and exiles did regarding these illegal marriages.  However, Paul states in Rom 15:4, “For whatever was written in former days was written for our instruction….”  Indeed, their solution might well have to be considered today in some circumstances.

Mal 2:13 - 16 (ESV) 13And this second thing you do. You cover the Lord’s altar with tears, with weeping and groaning because he no longer regards the offering or accepts it with favor from your hand.  14But you say, “Why does he not?” Because the Lord was witness between you and the wife of your youth, to whom you have been faithless, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant 15Did he not make them one, with a portion of the Spirit in their union? And what was the one God seeking? Godly offspring. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and let none of you be faithless to the wife of your youth.  16“For the man who hates and divorces, says the Lord, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says the Lord of hosts. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and do not be faithless.”

Here the prophets’ voice is most clearly heard regarding this issue of divorce.  This passage reckons back to Genesis 2:19-25, and not to Deut 24:1-4.  God did not accept their tears, their weeping, their groaning, and he had no regard for their offerings.  Why?  It is because the men had been faithless in their marriages with their wives.  God had put those marriages together, and man had no right to separate them.  God held them accountable to that first union.  Their sorrow and their sacrifices would not change His mind about their unapproved marriages.

New Testament Teachings.

Teaching of John the Baptist:

 

Mark 6:16 - 20 (ESV) 16But when Herod heard of it, he said, “John, whom I beheaded, has been raised.”  17For it was Herod who had sent and seized John and bound him in prison for the sake of Herodias, his brother Philip’s wife, because he had married her.  18For John had been saying to Herod, “It is not lawful for you to have your brother’s wife.”  19And Herodias had a grudge against him and wanted to put him to death. But she could not,  20for Herod feared John, knowing that he was a righteous and holy man, and he kept him safe. When he heard him, he was greatly perplexed, and yet he heard him gladly.

Herodias and Philip were married.  Herod (who was Philip’s brother) seduced Herodias, she divorced Philip and married Herod.  John said, “It is not lawful for you to have your brother’s wife.”  His reference was to Lev 18:16 and 20:21.  God saw Herodias as still the wife of Philip.  Herod and Herodias disagreed with God and John the Baptist, and eventually murdered John the Baptist for criticizing their marriage.  This shows us that local law and customs do not trump God’s law.

 

Terms

 

There are specific Greek words used to describe adultery in the New Testament.  According to W.E. Vine, An Expository Dictionary of New Testament Words, Fleming H. Revell Company, Old Tappan, NJ, 1966, these are as follows:

 

NOUNS

VERBS

μοιχός denotes one who has unlawful intercourse with the spouse of another, Luke 18:11; 1 Cor 6:9; Heb 13:4. As to James 4:4, see below.

μοιχάω to commit adultery, used in the Middle Voice in the NT, is said of men in Matt 5:32; 19:9; Mk 10:11; of women in Mk 10:12.

μοιχαλίς an adultress, used both in a natural sense, 2 Pet 2:14; Rom 7:3; and in a spiritual sense, James 4:4.

μοιχεύω to commit adultery, used in Matt 5:27, 28, 32 (some texts in vs 32 have #1); 19:18; Mk 10:19; Lk 16:18; 18:20; John 8:4; Rom 2:22; 13:9; James 2:11; in Rev 2:22, metaphorically, of those who are by Jezebel’s solicitations are drawn away to idolatry.

μοιχεία adultery, as found in Matt 15:19; Mk 7:21; John 8:3 (A.V. only).

 

 

The following two references give these definitions for adultery:

 

Title:   Easton’s Bible Dictionary
Edition:   First
Copyright:   Copyright © Ellis Enterprises, Inc., 1993

Adultery

CONJUGAL INFIDELITY. AN ADULTERER WAS A MAN WHO HAD ILLICIT INTERCOURSE WITH A MARRIED OR A BETROTHED WOMAN, AND SUCH A WOMAN WAS AN ADULTERESS. INTERCOURSE BETWEEN A MARRIED MAN AND AN UNMARRIED WOMAN WAS FORNICATION. ADULTERY WAS REGARDED AS A GREAT SOCIAL WRONG, AS WELL AS A GREAT SIN.

 

 

Title:   Holman Bible Dictionary
Edition:   Third
Copyright:   Copyright © 1991 Holman Bible Publishers. All rights reserved. International copyright secured. Electronic Edition STEP Files Copyright © 1998, Parsons Technology, Inc.

ADULTERY is the act of unfaithfulness in marriage that occurs when one of the marriage partners voluntarily engages in sexual intercourse with a person of the opposite sex other than the marriage partner.

 

Now with an understanding of these terms and definitions, let us explore what Jesus says about marriage, divorce and remarriage.

 

The Teachings of Jesus:

 

Matt 15:17 - 20 (ESV) 17Do you not see that whatever goes into the mouth passes into the stomach and is expelled?  18But what comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart, and this defiles a person.  19For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false witness, slander.  20These are what defile a person. But to eat with unwashed hands does not defile anyone.”

Mark 7:20 - 23 (ESV) 20And he said, “What comes out of a person is what defiles him.  21For from within, out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery 22coveting, wickedness, deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, pride, foolishness.  23All these evil things come from within, and they defile a person.”

These two passages show that Jesus regards adultery as a serious sin and that adultery defiles a person.  Jesus says that this sin comes from our hearts.

 

Mark 10:11 - 12 (ESV) 11And he said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her,  12and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.”

Luke 16:18 (ESV) 18“Everyone who divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery, and he who marries a woman divorced from her husband commits adultery.

In these two passages, Jesus strongly teaches the permanence of marriage in the eyes of God.  Although many people in the Western culture completely disagree with Christ, there is no evidence that our prejudices, opinions and culture will change God’s mind regarding marriage, divorce and remarriage.

 

Matt 5:27 - 32 (ESV) 27“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’  28But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart 29If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell.  30And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body go into hell. 31“It was also said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’  32But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery. And whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

Matt 19:3 - 12 (ESV) 3And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, “Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause?”  4He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female,  5and said,‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh’?  6So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”  7They said to him, “Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?”  8He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.  9And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.” 10The disciples said to him, “If such is the case of a man with his wife, it is better not to marry.”  11But he said to them, “Not everyone can receive this saying, but only those to whom it is given.  12For there are eunuchs who have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let the one who is able to receive this receive it.”

These two passages contain a more comprehensive account of Christ’s teachings on marriage, divorce, and remarriage.  In Matt 5, Jesus shows us that lust is the condition of the heart that causes people to defile themselves.  It is the picturing in one’s mind of sexually desiring and longing for someone who is not yours to have.  Christ says in a hyperbolic manner that WE MUST DO EVERYTHING POSSIBLE TO AVOID ADULTERY.  His language regarding gouging out eyes and cutting off hands are to be understood in this manner.  Clearly He is saying that we will certainly go to Hell if we engage in adultery.  This is deadly serious language.  Jesus clearly says that if we divorce our wives, we make them to become adulteresses, undoubtedly because they will feel free to remarry.  And if a man marries a divorced woman he commits adultery.  This is not confusing language.  Only the hardness of our hearts and minds will cause us to misunderstand the words of the Son of God.

 

Matt 19 gives further information.  The Pharisees ask Jesus a specific question, “Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause?”  Actually this is a fortunate question for us as they are asking for Jesus’ opinion regarding any divinely approved cause regarding divorce.  The two opposing opinions among the Rabbis of that time were that divorce could be for any cause, or divorce could be only for sexual immorality.  In answering, Jesus cites Scriptural authority from Gen 2:24, where “…a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”  Christ’s critical interpretation followed: “What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”  He thus shows that God’s will for marriage is a life-long monogamous relationship between a man and a woman.  It is permanent because God joined them together, and man has no authority to separate what God has joined.

 

The Pharisees counter by citing Deut 24:1-4, showing that Moses commanded the certificate of divorce before sending the wife away.  Jesus explained that this was an allowance God granted because of their hard hearts, but that was not God’s plan for marriage.  Again Jesus drives home the point by saying, “…whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”  This was tough language when Jesus spoke it, and it is tough language for us now, especially in the Western culture.  We don’t want to hear this because we, like the Jews, are fond of divorcing our mates for any reason and marrying whomever we want.  In so many instances, what God wants is of no importance to us.  Rather it is our own selfish desires that rule the day.  We even delude ourselves into thinking that we have received a “sign” from God that is it OK to divorce and marry another, even it is clearly wrong according to God’s Word.  Marriage is permanent.  God made it permanent in the Garden of Eden, at the very dawn of life.  God joined the first man and the first woman together and clearly implied by His actions that no man had any authority to separate what He had joined.  Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery.  God wants marriage to be permanent, permanent, permanent.

 

In both Matt 5 and Matt 19, Jesus gives only a single exception to his command that whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery.  He says, “except for sexual immorality.”  Sexual immorality, then, is the ONLY exception to this law of Christ concerning marriage.  If a man divorces his wife because she is sexually immoral, and then marries another wife, he DOES NOT commit adultery.  Note that Jesus does not command that they must divorce under these condition.  However, under this circumstance divorce is legitimate before God.

 

Jesus concluded the Matt 19 passage by talking about being single.  When the apostles realize that Jesus is saying marriage is permanent, they appear to be appalled over the prospect of marrying poorly, and being stuck with such a marriage.  They say, “If such is the case of a man with his wife, it is better not to marry.”  Jesus then talks about being single, the fact that it can be good for the kingdom, but shows that being single is not everyone, “…but only those to whom it is given.”  Paul will also talk about being single in 1 Cor 7 (see below).

 

Now it is wise to know exactly what the Bible means by “sexual immorality,” since this is the ONLY reason given by Christ whereby God will accept divorce. This is the Greek word πορνεία and the meaning is summarized well by Thayer:

 

Title:   Thayer’s Greek Definitions
Edition:   Third
Copyright:   Electronic Edition STEP Files Copyright © 1999, Parsons Technology, Inc.

G4202

πορνεία

porneia

Thayer Definition:

1) illicit sexual intercourse

1a) adultery, fornication, homosexuality, lesbianism, intercourse with animals etc.

1b) sexual intercourse with close relatives; Lev. 18

1c) sexual intercourse with a divorced man or woman; Mk. 10:11,12

2) metaphorically the worship of idols

2a) of the defilement of idolatry, as incurred by eating the sacrifices offered to idols

Part of Speech: noun feminine

 

In other words, “sexual immorality” includes all intercourse outside of the man-woman marriage.  Thus, “sexual immorality” is not only an untrue spouse having illicit intercourse, but also a mate who is engaged in illicit intercourse before marriage.  It includes all behaviors that are unchaste.  See also the following summarization of this definition:

 

Title:   Holman Bible Dictionary
Edition:   Third
Copyright:   Copyright © 1991 Holman Bible Publishers. All rights reserved. International copyright secured. Electronic Edition STEP Files Copyright © 1998, Parsons Technology, Inc.

As a whole, the New Testament uses porneia, most often translated fornication, in at least four ways:

1. Voluntary sexual intercourse of an unmarried person with someone of the opposite sex (1 Cor. 7:21 Thess. 4:3).

2. A synonym for adultery (Matt. 5:3219:9). See AdulteryDivorce.

3. Harlotry and prostitution (Rev. 2:1420).

4. Various forms of unchastity (John 8:41Acts 15:201 Cor. 5:1).

 

The Teachings of Paul:

 

Rom 7:1 - 4 (ESV) 1Or do you not know, brothers—for I am speaking to those who know the law—that the law is binding on a person only as long as he lives?  2Thus a married woman is bound by law to her husband while he lives, but if her husband dies she is released from the law of marriage 3Accordingly, she will be called an adulteress if she lives with another man while her husband is alive. But if her husband dies, she is free from that law, and if she marries another man she is not an adulteress. 4Likewise, my brothers, you also have died to the law through the body of Christ, so that you may belong to another, to him who has been raised from the dead, in order that we may bear fruit for God. 

In this passage, Paul takes an illustration from the old law to show that we live under Christ’s new covenant and not under the old law.  This illustration is regarding the law of marriage.  However, this law cannot be found in the Old Testament except in the obvious implications of Genesis 2:24.  This is indeed the basis for Christ’s doctrine of marriage.  Marriage is permanent.  It can only be broken by death here.  If the husband is married and his wife is found to be with another man, then she is an adulteress.  She is an adulteress for as long as she lives with a man who is not her husband.  God hasn’t changed his mind.  Marriage is permanent, and the only honorable way to dissolve a marriage is by death of the husband or the wife.  If we are found living with someone other than our spouse, we are sinning and living in adultery.

 

1 Cor 6:9 - 11 (ESV) 9Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality,  10nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God 11And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

In this passage that Paul wrote to Christians in Corinth, he shows that sexually immoral people, including adulterers, will not inherit the kingdom of God.  In other words, if these Christians are practicing adultery, i.e., if they are with someone other than their first spouse, then they cannot go to heaven.  Since they live in it and practice this sin, they are guilty of this sin for as long as they are together.  However, Paul also shows that this sin of adultery can be forgiven.  He says that some of these Christians once practiced these sins.  But they obviously repented and stopped practicing these sins, for Paul says, “And such WERE some of you.”  At their baptism they were sanctified and justified in the name of Jesus by the Holy Spirit.  Adultery is not an unforgivable sin.  For the person who has obeyed the terms of salvation already (see Acts 2:38), and then has fallen into adultery or other sins, the Scripture prescribes what we must do to be forgiven:  There must be confession of sin, repentance (a change in mind and life) and prayer asking for God’s mercy and forgiveness (see Acts 8:22; 1 John 1:5-9).  We are continually cleansed of our sins by Jesus’ blood, but only if we walk in the light as He is in the light.  We cannot have fellowship with Him if we walk in darkness.

Some people have the mistaken impression that “repentance” simply means being sorry for sins.  It certainly includes that, but it means more than that in Biblical terms.  Note what Paul says regarding the relationship between godly sorrow, repentance, and eternal life:

2 Cor 7:10 (ESV) 10For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief produces death. 

Godly sorrow or grief is not the same thing as repentance, but godly sorrow produces repentance, and this leads to salvation.  So what is repentance?

Acts 26:20 (ESV) 20but declared first to those in Damascus, then in Jerusalem and throughout all the region of Judea, and also to the Gentiles, that they should repent and turn to God, performing deeds in keeping with their repentance

Biblical repentance is turning to God, and showing by our actions that we have indeed repented.  It is a change in mind and life.  Perhaps to most memorable illustration of repentance is the account of the Prodigal Son in Luke 15:11-32.  He changed his mind about his sin, he left his sinning, he returned to his father and he pleaded for forgiveness.

1 Cor 7:10 - 16 (ESV) 10To the married I give this charge (not I, but the Lord): the wife should not separate from her husband  11(but if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband), and the husband should not divorce his wife. 12To the rest I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her.  13If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him.  14For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.  15But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace.  16Wife, how do you know whether you will save your husband? Husband, how do you know whether you will save your wife?

1 Cor 7:39 (ESV) 39A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord

1 Cor 7 has been variously interpreted by many people.  However, we must note the first (vs 10) and last (vs 39) divine commands made through the apostle Paul on the subject of marriage, divorce and remarriage, for these serve as context within which all else must be understood.

 

Now before delving into 1 Cor 7, we must ask the question, what is the authority of an apostle in regard to commanding us?  First we must realize that an apostle cannot change what Christ has commanded (Gal 1:8).  However, Christ instructed His apostles that the Holy Spirit would help them remember His teachings, would guide them into all truth, and would reveal new teachings to them as He would direct.

 

An excellent summary of this in found in the Gospel written by John.  Christ taught the apostles that he would send the Holy Spirit to them after his ascension and the Holy Spirit would do several things for them, including—

  1. Would teach them all things (John 14:26)
  2. Would bring to their remembrance all that he had told them (John 14:26)
  3. Would bear witness about Christ (John 15:26)
  4. Would convict the world regarding sin, righteousness and judgment (John 16:8)
  5. Would reveal new information to the apostles that Christ had not taught them during his earthly ministry (John 16:12)
  6. Would lead them into all truth (John 16:13)
  7. Would not speak on his own authority, but whatever the Holy Spirit hears he will speak to the apostles, and will declare things that are to come (John 16:13)
  8. Would glorify Christ, would take from Christ what is Christ’s and declare it to the apostles (John 16:14).

In addition, Christ tells his apostles that if people obeyed His teaching, they would obey the apostles’ teaching also (John 15:20).  Thus, not only are Christ’s commands binding on us, but so are the commands of his apostles, for they are really the commands of Christ also.  Therefore, Paul has full authority to command us as he is an apostle of Christ.

 

In 1 Cor 7:1-9, Paul affirms, as a concession, that “…because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.” (1 Cor 7:2).  The tension in these verses is between remaining single and becoming married.  He wishes that all were as he was (i.e., single), but acknowledges that each has his own gift.  He affirms the rightness of marriage and the rightness of remaining single, especially for the unmarried and widows.  He acknowledges the problem of sexual tension when he says, “For it is better to marry than to be aflame with passion.”

 

In 1 Cor 7:10-11, Paul gives the divine command that marriage is permanent.  Clearly this is written to Christians since what follows is written to mixed marriages.  God does not want separation in marriage, but reconciliation.  If separation takes place, then living “unmarried” is the ONLY option granted if reconciliation is not possible.  Divorce is forbidden.  Please note that Paul gives NO option for divorce in this circumstance.  It is very important to understand these two verses, because nothing in the following verses can turn this divine commandment on its head.

 

In 1 Cor 7:12-16, Paul addresses the marriage of a believer to an unbeliever.  He introduces this by saying that he has no command from the Lord regarding this, and is giving his best advice (compare verse 25).  This problem of mixed marriages always exists wherever there is evangelism.  Frequently one spouse will believe, while the other will not.  He commands the believers NOT TO DIVORCE their unbelieving spouses.  There is a sense in which the entire family is made holy by the presence of a believing spouse, meaning that God has chosen to work in the situation.  His goal is for the believing spouse to save their mate.  However, if the unbelieving spouse decides to leave the believing spouse, Paul says, “...let it be so.  In such cases the brother of sister is not enslaved.” (vs 15).

 

This statement has caused great speculation, with many claiming that Paul made abandonment grounds for divorce.  If this is true, then Paul allows divorce in this situation when the divine command to Christians prohibits divorce in a similar situation (vs 11).  This creates a double standard if we say that is what Paul means.  It all centers around the meaning of “…is not enslaved.”  Since it is extremely unlikely that Paul is contradicting the divine command, we should understand “…is not enslaved” to mean that the believing spouse is not enslaved to a failed marriage.  They are permitted to remain single, just as the divine commandment allows for believers (vs 11).

 

In 1 Cor 7:17-24, Paul speaks of his rule in all the churches, and this is, “Only let each person lead the life that the Lord has assigned to him, and to which God has called him.” (vs 17).  He repeats this rule in vss 20 and 24.  The examples he gives are circumcision versus uncircumcision, and slavery versus being a freedman.  Regarding the issue of circumcision, Paul says that “For neither circumcision counts for anything nor uncircumcision, but keeping the commandments of God.”  Regarding the issue of slavery, he says they should not be concerned about it, but to gain their freedom if they have the opportunity.  Obviously Paul is applying this principle to what he has already discussed, that is, the marriage of believer to an unbeliever.  Paul wants them to remain in those marriages if the unbelievers will agree to stay with the believing spouses.  That is his reason for stating this principle here.

 

To make application of Paul’s principle that “Each one should remain in the condition in which he was called” (vs 20) to something that Paul has not applied it is risky.  Paul would not advocate remaining in anything that would be illegal, immoral or unethical.  1 Cor 6:9-11 clearly indicates that sin must be recognized and there must be genuine repentance.  That includes adultery among others.  Such sins must be spoken of in the past tense for Christians.  If someone was a thief before coming to Christ (vs 10), God would forgive him because of the blood of Christ (Rom 6:3-5) but he must leave his life of being a thief.  If someone was a homosexual before coming to Christ (vs 9), God would forgive him because of the blood of Christ but he must leave his life of being a homosexual.  The same thing would have been demanded of those who were practicing adultery.

 

In 1 Cor 7:25-40, Paul returns to the tension between being married versus unmarried (compare vss 1-9).  He again affirms both conditions, but he obviously prefers that the unmarried remain unmarried “…in view of the present distress….” (vs 26).  Indeed, history would prove Paul correct about this impending distress, for Christians would be persecuted to their deaths in only a few years.  Paul makes a strong case for remaining unmarried, but clearly states that it is not sinful to marry.  In verse 39, Paul returns to the divine command regarding marriage, and it is worthwhile to quote it again:

 

1 Cor 7:39 (ESV) 39A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. 

Marriage is permanent.  Here only death can dissolve the joining that God has performed on a husband and wife.  If a marriage is dissolved by death, then the surviving spouse may marry, but only if that person is a Christian.  This is a hard message for this century in America.  The Western Culture must take notice, for the God of heaven and earth has spoken His will regarding marriage, divorce and remarriage.  Let us not have a hard heart or a hard head like the Jews of old, who suffered total loss because they would not listen or obey the teachings of their God.

 

Summary of Marriage, Divorce, and Remarriage

 

1.                  In Matthew 19:3-6, Jesus speaks of marriage as being from the beginning, is defined as leaving, being united with his wife, and becoming one flesh.  This joining of husband and wife is done by God.

2.                  In Matthew 19:7-9, Jesus speaks of divorce as being against the will of God, and was only tolerated in the Old Covenant because of the hardness of Jews’ hearts.  He says the only reason God accepts for divorce is sexual immorality.

3.                  In Matthew 19:10-12, Jesus speaks of being single instead of being married, and is a viable opinion if one can accept it.

 

Modern Objections to Christ’s Teachings on Marriage, Divorce and Remarriage

 

There are numerous modern objections to Christ’s teachings on marriage, divorce and remarriage.  We will consider some of these here.

 

First, many people do not believe that Jesus was actually the Son of God, and that the miracles documented in the Gospels were invented by the apostles and the early church.  Thus they believe that the Bible is a false document, and whatever it says has no authority over our lives.  Although they cannot show any early document that can support their position, they hold tenaciously to their position.  They are not condemned because of their position on marriage, divorce and remarriage, but because they do not believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of the Living God (Matt 16:13-19; John 3:18; 12:48).

 

Others admit to the Biblical account, and even say that they believe in Jesus, but say that the demands of culture must modify the Biblical teachings, yes, modify even the commands of Christ.  They say, “This was their story, but it is not my story.”  Their hermeneutic is what they feel the text says to them regardless of the original message.  Again, they are judged because they reject the teachings of Christ for themselves (John 12:48).

 

Still others, hurting for the masses of people in the Western culture who have been unfaithful to the spouse of their youth, reason that divorce it the issue, and if one repents of divorce, then God forgives them and allows them to be married to someone who is not the wife of their youth.  However, this is completely inconsistent with the teachings of Christ.  You cannot condone marriages which constitute the daily practice of adultery.  Repentance is a really tough command, and God makes real demands on us in this commandment.  There is no sin that we can willingly remain in and be pleasing to God.  A liar must stop lying.  A thief must stop stealing.  An adulterer must stop committing adultery.  Jesus says, “No, I tell you, but unless you repent, you will all likewise perish.” (Luke 13:3, 5).

 

Nothing will stand that does not conform to the teachings of Christ.

 

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